Being involved in self-judgment makes you lose sight of the big picture. It would be helpful to consider how your actions have affected others around you.
As we all live as a part of various systems, our behaviors and attitudes affect others just as much, and sometimes even more, than they affect ourselves. A good way to take the focus away from your negative self-assessment, is to focus positive attention on others.
This broader focus will help reorient your attention to what matters the most and encourages you to make changes that benefit others. Pursuing compassionate goals, in the place of self-image goals, has been observed to result in less conflictual relationships, more support and less loneliness.
A focus only on protecting one’s self-esteem results in other people emerging as competition and a complete failure to recognize their needs.
Oskar Blakstad (Mar 28, 2016). Compassionate Goals. Retrieved Oct 02, 2023 from Assisted Self-Help: https://staging.explorable.com/en/e/compassionate-goals